Car and Car, Oppressors at Large

A few things I'm nervous about

Dear Car,

As you know, I'm a little nervous right now. For one thing, we're going camping tomorrow and J and I don't have a tent. We also don't have sleeping bags or any other supplies. This isn't that big a deal, I mean, we'll be drinking margaritas in the sand, right? And I probably won't care after too long that I have to sleep below the dunes in a soft mound of sea grass, but the problem is this issue is being compounding by another one, and that's that I'm having my very first bikini wax tonight.

I'm not nervous about the pain, or the intimacy of someone inspecting that area, applying hot wax, and then ripping it off violently. What I'm worried about is all the warnings everybody posts on their spa webpages about how "Your HAIR DOWN THERE BETTER BE LONG ENOUGH FOR US TO WAX OR ELSE." Ok, I'm kidding. No one's webpage says that exactly, but can you think of anything worse than having some stranger down there, ready to wax your private realm, and for her to suddenly say, "Listen up, girly, you've wasted my time, that hair isn't the proper 1/4 inch we talked about," and then leave you, prostrate and totally not ready to wear a bathing suit on the cold, hard waxing table?

Can you? Can you think of anything worse?

Actually, you know what might be worse? Living in Kelly Ct. again. With the vodka drinkers. I'll think about that while it's happening.

xixixixixixixixi
car

posted by Cara Maria McDonough @ 10:07 AM